Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays. （Henry Youngman）
有人问我和我老婆婚姻长久的诀窍：大家两个口子非常会享受生活，每周两次去餐厅吃饭。烛光、晚餐、轻音乐、跳舞。她周二去一次，我周五去一次。
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. （Rodney Dangerfield）
我和我老婆幸福地生活了20年。然后大家就相遇了。
Marriage isn't a word it's a sentence.（King Vidor）
婚姻不是一个词汇 它是一个判决（句子）。
Marriage requires a man to purchase 4 types of Ring - engagement ring, wedding ring, suffe-ring and endu-ring.
婚姻需要男性购买4种ring（戒指） 订婚ring，结婚ring， suffe-ring （苦难）和endu-ring（忍耐）
Marriage life is full of excitement and frustration1. In the first year, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. And in the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
婚姻生活充满了开心和沮丧。第一年，男性说话女性在听，第二年，女性说话男性在听，第三年，两人同时说话，邻居们在听。
Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.
爱情是一场长长甜甜的梦，婚姻就是闹钟。
They say that when a man holds a woman's hand and before marriage. It is love. After marriage is self-defense.
他们说：在结婚以前，男性紧握女性的手，那是爱；若是结婚以后，那是自卫。
When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
当新婚男性看起来非常幸福，大家了解是为何。但结婚十年的男性看起来非常幸福，大家想了解是为何。
We don't love qualities, we love persons; sometimes by reason of their defects as well as of their qualities. （Jacques Maritain）
大家爱的不是优点，大家爱的是人，有时是由于他们的缺点，附携带他们的优点。
I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry2. （Rita Rudner）
我觉得穿过耳洞的男性对结婚筹备得更为充分。他们已经历程了痛苦，而且购买了珠宝。
It is not uncommon3 for slight acquaintances to get married, but a couple really have to know each other to get porced.
这并不是罕见：稍微相识一些就可能结婚，但夫妇还真得互相知道才会离婚。
To marry is to halve4 your rights and double your duties. （Arthur Schopenhauer）
结婚就是将你的权利减半，将你的职责加倍。
Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing. （Goethe）
爱情是理想的事情，婚姻是现实的事情。
A happy home is one in which each spouse5 grants the possibility that the other may be right, though neither believes it. （Don Fraser）
一个幸福的家庭是如此的：双方都觉得他们大概是对的，尽管双方都不相信他们是对的。
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, and always with the same person. （Mignon McLaughlin）
一个成功的婚姻需要恋爱不少次，而且一直是与同一个人恋爱。